Lindsay in the morgue
She was late for work in the county morgue
For she couldn’t find the place,
To impress the captive cliental she painted up her face
The mood there on the gurneys was almost a lilting glee,
For the dead had never had some help,
From someone dead as she.
She thought she’d liven up the place
And sing a song or two
But all that this accomplished
Was making them more blue.
She finally came to hate it there,
The corpses seemed to sneer.
And truly made her understand
The death of her career.
Sometimes then if you listen, way down in the hospital bowels,
The dead ones all remember, with screams and awful howls
How a girl named Lindsay Lohan helped them leave this cruel world.
And how she was really like them,
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